There’s a negative dressing word that has a great impact on your dressing and your self-esteem.
That word is ‘JUST’.
Four simple letters that reveal more about you than you realise.
I am a fan of Janet Beckers and Wonderful Web Women. A while ago she was doing a series of 3 minute videos on One Word Hacks. (In this sense ‘hack’ is a positive replacement for a negative word.) They struck a chord with me as they are words we habitually use without thinking of their effect on our thoughts and actions. I have been taking ‘just’ out of my writing. And ‘just’ has a big effect on our dressing.
Here are some of my thoughts and experiences with ‘just’ shopping, ‘just’ dressing and ‘just’ decluttering.
Negative Dressing Word – Why Your Words are Important?
Sometimes we choose our words and sometimes words are a habit that we learnt in childhood and continue without thinking much about them. Janet believes that ‘just’ trivialises things. I agree.
‘Just’ can be a word that women have been subconsciously taught to use to appear docile around men. Both women and men often use ‘just’ around those of either sex when you think they are more powerful than you. It can be an excuse to avoid stepping into your own power. It can also be an excuse to resist change that scares you.
It is not until you examine when and why you add ‘just’ into your words that you realise what power it has over you. Eliminating and changing unconscious, habitual words can have a very positive effect on your attitude and self-esteem and often leads to a change in your life or work direction.
Click on the Video graphic to watch Janet’s ‘Replace JUST with …..’
Negative Dressing Word – ‘I’ll Just Buy This’
Have you ever gone shopping and cannot find something you like? Instead of going home or elsewhere, you go ‘I’ll just buy this’. You come home with a second best choice. Because of that, you’re not keen to wear it. And somehow it gets taken out of your wardrobe and put back again. You simply cannot convince yourself to wear it. I’ve done that.
Earlier this year I was looking for holiday tops for England’s changeable weather. I bought a few ‘just will do’ tops. All were adjusted to fit me perfectly. That was not enough. One top was only ever worn when I took the rest of my clothes to a laundromat. I didn’t feel joy wearing it. It has since been recycled for someone else to enjoy.
Recently, I considered buying ‘just in case’ really warm Kathmandu clothes for a holiday that is 18 months away. Ridiculous!
The negative dressing word, ‘just’, as a buying decision is selling you short. Take Janet’s advice and mine in hindsight and replace ‘just’ with silence. Buy it if you are sure it will bring you joy to look at and wear. Otherwise, don’t buy it.
Negative Dressing Word – ‘I’ll Just Wear This’
Janet’s one word hack for ‘just’ is ‘simply’. When you are choosing what to wear from your wardrobe, instead of saying ‘I’ll just wear this’ substitute ‘I’ll simply wear this’. The feeling and the message are completely different.
The negative dressing word, ‘just’, puts yourself down. The word almost makes it feel like a last resort. Sometimes you double or triple your low self-esteem by the words you use as an explanation before and/or after your ‘Just wear this’ sentence.
‘I’ll simply wear this’ honours your choice. It allows you to walk out with a lighter heart. It was a choice not a judgment.
‘I’ll just wear this’ is often a sentence used when women are in the process of losing weight. Instead of going forward and honouring your progress with clothes that reflect your changed mindset, you keep your old clothes as is. This tells your body that you are not really committed. It gives your emotions and past thinking habits the opportunity to undermine your resolve.
Negative Dressing Word – ‘I’ll Just Keep This’
Thirdly, ‘I’ll just keep this’ is a way to avoid decluttering your wardrobe of clothes and accessories that no longer of may never have given you joy when wearing them. It’s saying ‘I don’t like this. But I am hoping one day to find something that will make this look fabulous’. Funny, that day never comes. Or ‘I’ll just keep these small clothes because I will fit into them one day.’ That day never comes either.
It’s best to get rid of those clothes. Those four words are stopping you from dealing with your underlying emotion. It’s usually grief. And grief is about being angry with yourself. Deal with this by downloading my free ‘Grief, Gratitude & Acceptance’ Process©.
Only keep clothes that bring you joy now.
Eliminate the negative dressing word ‘Just’ from your vocabulary and watch how it changes your thinking, acting and dressing. It’s not easy. There’ll be setbacks. Persevere. You’ll be very proud of yourself for doing it.
Click the graphic below for your free, simple decluttering technique.